My comfort zone

Thinking about the topic of Digital Artifact, I understood that I don’t want to do it only about social networks. First, I didn’t know what I could say. Every time I think that my words are not such significant. But as our articles, I wanted to do it personal.

The one to which I can appeal, if I lose the orienteer or if I forget what I learned and understood during my time as Erasmus student. So, I tried to combine my feelings and experience and make a little guideline about actions, my experience and a little changed mindset.

It contains a small story from part before Erasmus and changes during my stay here, about what we discussed in our sessions on Psychology and my thoughts taken out of them – not only about social networks, but also life.

At the beginning I made a presentation, but then I saw that I can make a video from it. And it was quite interesting – to turn on the music and list the slides. So, I hope that you will find something interesting and will enjoy it.

Link to digital artifact:  https://prezi.com/v/fsdv1vox1kad/living-in-reality/?preview=1

Dystopia, Utopia, Technophobia – all these narratives are connected with us – humans. I can say that the concept of technophobia is closer to me than others. Especially in our reality. Because of the pandemic, technology development, we began to spend too much time in our phones. I mean since childhood we are in devices – tv, phone, computer and this list never ends. We grow and technology progress rises too. We go together like best friends – everywhere and always. I noticed that before arrival in Greece, I spent most of the day in phone. But here, it is different. Now phone for is only for music and connection with home. So you begin to think – what’s next is waiting for you?

Discussing the future, I cannot say in what kind of world we will exist. We cannot predict what will happen – good or bad. What I’ve learned is that we can control ourselves. Control our amount of time in phones, look around and not be obsessive about checking our phones every 5 minutes. Of course, most people do that because of the stress, but for others it is a habit. As many people say – every change begins in yourself. So, that’s why I think that we can choose what future we will have. Technology is just a tool for us to make the world better.

Reading the chapter about «identity» from ITS Complicated, made me think about me as a teen. I mean I did all those things and thought exactly like illustrated in the chapter.

Even me and my friends, we created fake profiles as teens because it was fun – to watch after people you don’t like or follow some groups that were not meant for you, a little girl. It was sort of entertainment and a mysterious journey. Of course, we also had a real profile and after few years, I recognized that it was a silly idea to have a fake page, but I guess every teen did that in their life.

Also, it’s understandable why teens don’t provide the correct information on social media. Even in my childhood my parents and relatives always said to me that I shouldn’t write the age or something personal, cause you’ll never know who can use this information. Moreover, as a teen you can’t filter information that you give – you don’t exactly know what is right and what is wrong. That’s why I think you should give a phone as late as its possible and also check on sometimes where are they.

But anyway, I think nowadays people are becoming more open in digital society. They understand that honesty and explicit became more important than just a beautiful picture. Its just my opinion based on Instagram bloggers and reaction of their audience.  

Comparing how nature and a human systems work is really fascinating. I didn’t think that there are so many similarities in their interconnections. Connections between you and your friends, family make you YOU. So, possibility of experiencing from everybody – good and bad, makes you The person.

But another thought came to me when I was reading an article about neurobiology of human, If I can say so. There the psychologist discussed the fact that you project your current relations with your parents on your child memories. You will change memories in convenient for yourself way. Example – you respect your parent and love him without any sense of grievance; that means that if you start focusing on your child memories with that parent – you probably will remember something good. And the opposite: bad relationship with your parent – bad memories and you perhaps will change them into bad, even if there were not so many bad memories.

I started thinking about how social media deprive of truth. I mean we all have phones and computers where we store our childhood photos and photos of events in our live. But if you look at photo of you at 7 and start to remember what happened in this period of time, you just will not know is that about what you think is true. You’ll start asking your relatives about this photo, but are sure that they are telling the truth? Opinions are different and Who knows…

Our whole life is a learning. Learn how to deal with problems, people and how to manage all. I can’t say that I totally understood what is rhizomatic learning and this ecosystem mean, but in simple words – it is like every person and probably everything that surrounds you is an educator – sort of sharing experience, has no structure? If so, then I think it is a good thing, because people will be like children, learning from all around and the system will adapt and create new ways of thinking – mutual evolution. But will it actually work? I’m not sure. Of course, I know some people who inspire themselves from other people, events, etc. But most people just follow the leader. Maybe I just underestimate them, so whatever.

If this rhizomatic system is not linear, how can we calculate the consequences? In my opinion, consequences are the most important. They define all you’ve done. And this system is all about controversies – there are no similarities, no differences. For me, it is difficult to understand because I’m used to see the reason and consequence. And this system is in some way easier, bot at the same time more difficult, especially when you’re trying to understand all of this information.

Honestly, due to past 2 weeks I feel kind of lost. Sometimes, I think that this mood will follow me forever. On Sundays I come home, have breakfast and just wanna run. Anywhere, just not be here. I’m still trying to figure out why I feel this way but yet my attempts fail. So, I run. Bless the rules that allows to go everywhere on weekends in Athens. I don’t say that I saw much, but this situation helps me to see the city.

There are many articles and researches about Emotional Intelligence. Only yesterday I saw an interview about how you can understand others better if you understand your own feelings. I need it. Every time I go deep into myself, trying to understand how I really feel in this exact moment and fail. I want to understand people – not random one, but people I care a lot. And not just them – me also. But reading articles is not helpful. Listen, 13 signs of high EI, according to article by Justin Bariso:

1. You think about feelings.

2. You pause.

3. You strive to control your thoughts.

4. You benefit from criticism.

5. You show authenticity.

6. You demonstrate empathy.

7. You praise others.

8. You give helpful feedback.

9. You apologize.

10. You forgive and forget.

11. You keep your commitments.

12. You help others.

13. You protect yourself from emotional sabotage.

Judging on these signs I have EI. But is it really so? So, subjective. I think it’s a joke. I do all these things cause I think it’s right in relation to other people. Its my principles and I follow them. Let me know what do you think about this.

After reading pages from “Its complicated”, I’ve decided that the best way to express my feelings is to take some quotes from this book and give a feedback on them. It’s a good idea, cause some thoughts made me analyze some things. So, lets begin.

«It simply means that teens are generally more comfortable with—and tend to be less skeptical of—social media than adults. They don’t try to analyze how things are different because of technology; they simply try to relate to a public world in which technology is a given.»

Right. I think we are like people with a silver spoon. We are used to having phones with us everywhere. We can’t analyze the information; we can’t understand is it really true or not. Cause why? We have all we need in our phones. Even I sometimes need an advice from adult person, because I understand that they have a different view and can help to identify my words, feelings and emotions into some visual picture. And that’s great.

«Because of their experience and stage in life, teens and adults are typically focused on different issues. Whereas teens are focused on what it means to be in public, adults are more focused on what it means to be networked.»

That’s really true. Comparing our generation and our parents, we can see that we are soo different. We are seeking for attention and maybe some sort of admiration. We do crazy things. Why? Again, attention. But reactions on actions differ. Even to negative things – adults just skip it and will go on, but we will get looped on that. Of course, not everyone, but most of teens will.

«Technologies are often heralded as the solution to major world problems. When those solutions fail to transpire, people are disillu­sioned.»

Another good point. Often people rely on technologies too much and don’t realize that internet or your phone can’t solve every problem in the world. They are looking for answers but it can be right in front of your eye. And you don’t see it because of the phone.

«Developing meaningful friendships is a key component of the com­ing of age process.»

It’s easier to find friends when you’re a teen, right? Cause you’re looking at things in such innocent way. Honestly, I don’t agree that its easy to find friends. I had so many friends during my 20 years, but most of them just gone. Most adults say its hard to find someone to be friends with in their age. Not only one person said this thing to me. And I was like: are you sure? Cause for me it was not so easy to find my best friends. And I think it is just a matter of time – all relationships are difficult, but they need efforts.

I guess I can stop at these 4 things but I think I’ll read the whole book because all the author saying is resonating within me.

When you’re trying to think about the history of social networking, you become really impressed by the development of IT sphere for the past 70 years – from ARPANET until our times. But also, you’re keep thinking: «What’s next? » Maybe we don’t know a bit about internet and its elements.

One thing that is obvious for all of us is that everything changed. Changed in a global way and our minds are also different now. We don’t think the same way as for example our grandparents. We can’t imagine ourselves without the Internet. We communicate with its help, even travel through it. But is it a good thing? I’m not so sure.

In my opinion, most people don’t know how to talk to each other in a real world. We can’t express our feelings in an understandable way. We stuck in this digital sphere and don’t want to return to reality. Even in psychology you have a term – escapism. A person prefers the digital instead of reality because he may think that reality is too boring or unpleasant. And we don’t even try to find good and enjoyable things cause in our head there is a thought that digital is better. I have the same thoughts sometimes. That’s why I need a constant reminder that I have loving friends, family and my favorite things – little rituals and songs which cheer me up.

Before the beginning of this course, I didn’t know what to expect there. I like psychology and everything that is connected with it, even if sometimes I don’t understand some things. This meeting exceeded my expectations.

This course was the first one where I could speak or share my thoughts. Most of the time I don’t like speaking in English because I feel insecure about my level of language. But here it was okay probably because of the atmosphere. I guess a problem of being yourself or expressing yourself is that nowadays social media imposes fear of everything. Social networking has such a huge impact on humans that people don’t know anymore how to react, how to speak and how to be themselves. Every step a person does, is evaluated in terms of how the other person will look at it, not yourself. 

But the biggest question that came up into my mind after the meeting was “How we can define what is personal and too much personal?” After all, it’s a tricky question. I’m sure that every thought and every feeling is personal, no matter about what topic we’re talking about. Every person has its own boundaries and for someone, even talking about his pet will be too personal. So, I don’t quite understand how to define this edge between personal and too much personal, but with some observations i think I’ll find the right thought about it.